Yo yo yo crew- It's about time Lev starts earnin' his keep around hea...nah mean! 2008 is almost gone and traffic is down big time most likely duet our ultrabland schedule...or is it???????????? So- from the dirty south...to Mikey in Queens, to GWA Abroad...and every other sucka in between:
(to the tune of Piano man)
Well it's 3 oclock on a Friday...and the regular gwhoops crew has gone to bed,,,
There's an old alum sitting net to me...shouting out all the upset wins we ever had
den ne ne de ne ne de de de d e de ne ne de ne ne....de de de de...
He says Lev can you read off this year's schedule, as he smiles at the thought of 2006,
Well its sad and it's still discrete since they wont release it on the street...so get used to not being in... the fuckin know...
de ne ne de ne ne... de de de de De ne ne... de ne ne...de de de de
Well my dear friends, the long drought is behind us. I have clearly been remissed when it comes to the 10 or so Recaps that i owe in 2008. Slowly but surely, those threads will reappear throughout the year, giving me one last chance to make y'all laugh at some of our finer moments on Gwhoops.com. This Gwhoops.com year has been marked with poster epulsions, threats to our beloved site owner (ok ok- cant actually confirm that), multiple identity discoveries...among other truly eciting subplots that are sure to keep even Dan Steinberg's blog bareable. So without any further ado: I bring to you, a no holds barred, Kimbo sliced and recession proof Recap for y'all to enjoy.... sponsored by Empire BC/BS. that's Empire Blue Cross/Blue Seats -- falsely insuring your health today by Bullshitting about how great your future bball schedules will be tomorrow.
1. MAILVAN- (the man, the myth, the legend)- He offers the following bet: GW will announce its official schedule BEFORE Septmeber 10th. Not after. He claims that this is a shocking "break from character" for himself- as usually- he has absolutely nothing positive to say about anything related ot the AD. Thus, he is assuming--- that it would be considered a positive that Gw's loyal fanbase actually finds out about their schedule well into September each year.
2. George the Hippo Hunter- (AKA Curious G and the swine of SJT)- contends that this year- no schedule will be released so as to lure the whole student body to our mysterious top 25 team...hmmmmmm
3. Porter 71- (check ya coat at the door biatch)- also contends that no official sced will come out for Gw. instead- it will be a guessing game for all ...perhaps today we play Duke...oh wait...more likely Longwood.
4. Mailvan- laughs off Porter's pretense that Duke was playing the smitty...
5. Andrew Alberg- (GW Hatchet's voice of reason...somewhat) Informs the community that the OOC schedule has been released by the Hatchet. But- was the whole OOC reported? Net on GWHoops Hospital!
6. Mentzinger- (The voice of Reason)- immediately looks toward Nov 14th against BU as the game he may show his New english blah blah blah...i hope the fuckin rays whoop your butt my dear friend
7. Long Suffering Fan- (life is always Sunny side DOWN bastard)- Instantly calls into question GW's apparent lack of full slated games for the 2008-9 season. He highlights the 10 OOC games scheduled in the Hatchet as well as the 16 A-10 games as he contends that gW will once again only play 26 games.
8. Porter71- Vents his frustration that Gw will apparently play less then their allowable allotment of games this year as well as having a second straight year of horrid OOC home opponents. He questions whether to renew his season tickets. HaHa- little does he know- Gw also scheduled a little preseason scrimmage against the Palin Pro-Lifers and the Biden UnSound-Bytes.
9. GwIslander- (where Everybody WANG Chungs tonight) - Starts the ripping into JK and the AD. calls for Knapp to start the new hire process in the AD.
10. Bluish seats- (Where hot air meets sarcastic flare)- This poster attempts to rile up the artist, formerly known as BS, in a lame attempt to call the Ad's disappointing schedule into question
11. LA Colonial- (Torre's Mimutemen)- Points out to LSF that we actually have three games in Hawaii (tourney)- but more debate on that relevancy to follow
12. LSF- (Lucy in the Sky with a Fuckin incomplete schedule) This is where the thread starts to get into the nitty gritty. LSF's post resonates well with many. He questions last year's theory that JK and the AD would have to schedule only OOC games against top 200 opponents. He questions why we can't garner even one game against 10 local (CAA or other) teams in a home/home swap. He jabs at the AD for not apllying a full schedule or even a full scholarship roster.
13. Mailvan- (We deliver the repetitious AD attack in rain, snow, hail etc..)- On a lighter note- he happily points out that the Hawaii tourney's three games actually only counts as 1 game. Therefore, smiles, cause that means Gw is leaving not one, but two games on the table for all to conjure.
14. Poog- ( TAL- The Admin. Liberator)- (AKA- I aint BS- so don't play me like an inside flop)- Poog comes on strong with an absolutely brilliant point...how the hell will Gw play Dayton at the smitty on inauguration Day. it simply wont happen as scheduled. Just a hunch.
15. BigFan- (Large in waist...but small in waste)- Directs us to the claim that has become old adage this past two years- why do we not have a full slate of games...and why does the Ad keep scheduling 5 disappointing home OOC's? More to come...on geraldo.
16. LA Fan- (AKA - Gwhoops.com poster meets tony stark)- Noting his constant tech savvy suggestions for a new Smitty- this poster mocks the GW AD's similarities to the secrecy tactics of the KGB and Stalinist Russia.
17. cagwu- (C A GWU fan?...that right...you're lookin right at em) - makes a great post suggesting that it's actually the rising cost of fuel that has kept JK and the AD away from scheduling merely decent games in our OOC.
18. Dootie bubble- (AKA- dootie bubble)- Can't decide what is worse...the fact that we play an away game versus Sac State this year...OR the actual fact that this may be the start of a home/home series with Sac St.
19. Bobo- (Skewattintattin..yayayaya)- Also brings up an interesting point about Sac. St. They seem to suck always...regardless if they are home and away. sort of like longwood. He contends that this is eactly the type of teams KH is looking for. He also suggests that we should try to see if NJ Institute of Technology has a home/home series available in the near future. After we play the bball game- we all get to go to Nathans to look at our muscle cars.
20. GRB- (ICUP) quickly questions why he should cough up the dough to renew
21. chrisw- (AKA chrisW)- claims its the smitty hot dogs that keep him renewing... nothing like eating hot dogs that look like cooked lincoln logs.
22. GWAlum Abroad- (Fun under the sun and the IP's to prove it)- Reminds us as to possibly why the Sac. st. game materialized. We tried for USF, and possibly others en route to the Hawaii tourney. This was the only one that they could get done.
23. Ziik- (the man who really does make shirts!)- Adds that its doubtful GW called many a western schools to set down a game. He mentions Gonzaga as an add on to GWAA's list. He inserts a below the belt Fairfiend joke here as well. ouch...yowza!
24. Then GWAA and Ziik - Start Pick nits back and forth. I guess here I can interject our first sponsor commercial for 2008-9 Levinator Recaps - Hey...when you find yourself sick of Pickin nits- perhaps its time to buy FQ's Bar BQ. That's right- now in this special offer...you can get FQ's BarBQ- complete with the Anti-BS ignition- sure to give you many a nights of statistical lean pork- no BS.
25. Consensus among active posters- We ought to go after tougher home/home. what the Phunk is up with the AD? This is eactly like last year- but worse
26. Gwhoops Maven- (Steppin to the heavies like he's the AD's safe haven)- Speaks the truth when he corrects the heavies that they are forgetting one of our better OOC games against auburn. good job hatchet. Jk. But- its true- when all is said and done- Gw does play 27 games (not GW) that count even though they really play 29. ehhh...right?
27. Levinator- (the muppet voice of Bob Barr)- Ouch. Levinator dares to suggest that this OOC schedule is perfect for the antincipated 2008-9 squad. It seems Kh is going after that magical 20 win season again- you know the one where if we lose the a-10- we likely only make the NIT.
28. Ziik- (not just a lawyer, but an AD litigator)- Sarcastically suggests that we should have kept the Red Auerbach tourney and the Presidential Classics so we could invite a bunch of Tech's and get to 20 wins. You know- that elusive Gw 20 win season where the whole world says we suck but our little world says we might not have sucked had we played a better OOC. you know...that type of season. Ziik does take the time to credit the potential guard play of this years GW squad!
29. Mailvan- Posts just 48 hours before his over/under bet will end. He pleads with the AD and the powers that be to officially announce gw's schedule before his imposed gambling line. What Mailvan doesn't know...is that KH and BS have been secretly working on adding a final game against the UPS under-30 team- our beloved mawilvan's intramural squad. Sources say...that Mailvan's loose bowels might preclude him from playing the point though. Guess it gives new meaning to the term- "what can Brown do for you, eh?"
30. Hatchet Man- (wow- i guess we will never know if you were really an editor for the hatchet- or just some plain psycho killer- ) HM- Uses the kindest of words to suggest that Gw's schedule is fuckin pathetic and the admin should die!
31. Waterboy- (hey...it certainly beat being the pissboy!) - Asks the obvious immediate question for out of towners- is the home game versus Dayton- the only real home game that he should attempt to come to? Aquaman- my answer is simple- perhaps. lol
32. LSF- (Lucy in the Sky with Fuckin LaSalle's OOC)- LSF graces us with Lasalle's 8 game home OOC schedule. they scored Florida state, bucknell, vlllanova, Rider and manhattan among others. He does recall that they ARE part of the Big 5 in phili- But- we do like his anger and disdain here. Go LSF...get mad baby!
33. Alumnus- (One alum who shouldn't be crossed) - How dare thee actually try to use reason and logic in your response to this thread! Lol. it is here where Alumnus asks us to eplore Rocha's response on a different thread and its possible link to the issue at hand. perhaps GW- a private school within a big city- subsidizes its vast sports lineup (M and W)- with the proceeds it garners from Bball sales. My one resonse to that point- sure rocha- but if you are so stuck that you need the BBall revenue to support the other teams- perhaps its time to schedule some big time programs that are sure to fill the smitty with ecited fans NO MATTER if we ended up with a W or L- that's just levinator's take.
34. Rangw- As if by some devine miracle...the UNDER wins...well done mailvan. Just in the nik of time.
35. Alumnus- (and now you're getting him angry!)- immediately begins the dissection process. He points out that the game against Harvard and AU are during or right after finals and that UMBC is Twas the NIGHT before Thanksgiving! Wow- what big draws you have JK!
36. Aston Party- (As opposed to a ton of asses party)- He actually thought an @Longwood was a joke. Oh...how hard it is to figure just who the joke is actually on?
37. Thinker- (Finally- someone with concrete thoughts!)- Reminds GWAA- that the reason why a team can possibly play 4 games in Hawaii- is because...perhaps...the teams that play in the championship- play one etra game
38. Cagwu- (Secret sleuth)- Discovers mailvan's True Identity- Captain Jack's minister of Disinformation
39. LSF- talks trash about the lack of t eposure...(prelude for threads to come)
40. Thinker- follows up alumnus's already harsh criticism by questioning the 1/3 date against longwood.
41. Mailvan- (Has his usually mid-thread meltdown) Goes bonkers on this schedule calling it the worst ever in the "history of the sport." He questions almost evevy OOC game and contends that a schedule where Auburn and UMD are the top draws is just downright the worst!
42. WCBaller- (stop yo whining biatches)- does earn some credit here for calling out Mailvan for being a bit over the top here. nonetheless- he needs to read a bit more about the shcedules the last 4 years.
43. Crazed philly fan- (Go phillies go)- recaps the thread- its about the lack of communication to the fanbase and the poor scheduling WCBaller!
44. Mailvan and FQ- both resond to WCBaller about why they whine so much over the schedule. Mailvan wants us all to know that he whined the MOST during the 2006 season where we went 27-3. He does back it up with valid reasons. FQ merely suggests to WCballer that he not a typical naysayer- but is currently being turned off by a number of issues lik elack of communication from thr Ad and failure to fill out a complete bballl schedule.
45. GRB threatens his 26 year renewal streak!
46. Mailvan tells cagwu that if did work for JK- he certainly would be fired by now. Actually- come to think of it- it seem sonly fitting that mailvan would be employed by our AD. After all we have been through together----hmmm
47. Notta Hater- (he's a lover...notta fighter)- makes GRB own up to his statement that he travels from Philly to Dc for every gw game even during the week.
48. GRB- Guarantees it and says he's been doing it for 3 years. then goes on to trash talk about he 1-27 season with a whole bunch of blah blah blah.
49. FredD- (The long lost cousin of ChrisW)- Poses a series of questions and statemetns. highlights- good to see AU- but why not Mason? Why not full allotment? Shitty schedule without the Rainbow! Is this really about money? He wishes he can rob banks like Stockbrokers and sell ARMS like mortgage lenders so he can steal the 100,000 to pay for us to play like sineea or some shit.
50. Ziik- goes at the schedule again attacking all that it is and all that it aint! Whatever happened to the furmans ans Stetsons...oh yeah...its called longwood and BU. I must admit though- how a tame arecap has been when Mailvan and ziik appear on the same side of the coin.
51. The ross-man! (I am me...hear me Ross!)- Offers a ride to anyone going to Auburn ..
52. DB- Anytime DB enteres into the road trip picture- you know its gonna get pretty eciting!
53. Mailvan suggest the students wear shirts that say the "Scedule sucks" and that adults wear ones that say "the schedule is unacceptable." i say Mailvan- your idea is unacceptable. Adults shirts should instead read." Stop Knapping...Fuckin fill the Schedule Por Favor"
54. Free Quebec- (cause God only knows what the world would be like without those stupid french canadians eh) FQ assesses that we are actually leaving 2 games on the table based on the new rules
55. BuffBlue- (The one man wrecking crew)- goes on a must read diatribe about the ills that make up our current AD. He aint taking shit from anybody. well..ecept maybe KH and JK again. lol
55. Bobo- confirms that FQ was right with his math. ummm.....d'uh! lol Liike any of us ever doubted him!
56. Mailvan ends the thread by pointing out that Sac St. also only scheduled 26 games. Thus, it was a match made in heavan between two teams who seem destined to meet in a battle of the ages.
In conclusion- the moral of this thread is that no matter how anti-AD Mailvan really is: He still was able to guess within 24 hours the eact time that Gw announced their 2008-9 schedule. Truly amazing. also- no matter how bad you think our OOC is, or how horrible it is that we didnt even schedule the correct allotment of games allowed----we still managed to alienate our small rabid fanbase by raising ticket prices and stifle all prudent correspondence to and fro.
2008 Levinator Recaps - where all it takes is just one palin wink!